Nope, just wasn’t expecting that.

You’re missing his whole gag.

Us Treasury bonds is where it’s at

They’ve become so attached that they get anxious without them.

“Oh man, I gotta park far away so it doesn’t read my plates and info from the car… Well I’ve gotta bring my Galaxy watch so it counts all the extra steps I’ll be taking.”

Honestly just easier to leave it at home. Or in your vehicle, assuming you didn’t pass by the camera on your way, and leave it sufficiently far enough away. I doubt they can read RFID from cards yet, even at a close enough distance to cut the pole down, but might want to leave those at home as well.

Just don’t forget to leave any electronic devices at home.

You had a typo in there but it still works. It’ll be profitable by sending you directed ads based on when you’re home and what rooms you’re in most.

My ex and I were roommates with 3 other people. The others were all gone and we were in my room getting ready, she got up to get lube or a vibrating cock ring or something, I can’t remember. But she left the door open. I’m laying there, dick straight up in the air when her cat jumps on my bed. Whatever, it’ll leave when we get down to business. But no, the cat sneakily crawls between my legs and licks the underside of my helmet. Right where that line of skin is that connects head to shaft. I freaked, cat freaked and ran off, I go soft and the mood is over.

If you thought a cats tongue was scratchy on your hand…

Just add half a cup of sugar to your half cup of yogurt.

I’m just glad I live in a part of the country that doesn’t have these things.

All I got was a damned E-5 and a deployment out of it.

“older” damn yo, don’t do that to me.

It’s depressing to me. Look at all the friends I had and fun things I used to do. Now I just exist.

Arise chicken, arise.

That’s cool, but like an ex with issues, I’m happy they’re in a better place now, but I am better off with them out of my life.

Probably ~15 years ago?

Wow, that’s actually pretty fascinating, thanks! It is weird though, that I like broccoli, cabbage and kale.

Brussels sprouts. “If you cook them ri” shut the fuck up right now. I’ve tried every single persons “right way” and they’re fucking disgusting. I’m never trying them again. Dog shit wrapped in bacon and dipped in bbq sauce is more likely to enter my mouth than another Brussels sprout ever again.

Also asparagus… But that’s for a different reason. When I was a kid my stepdad at the time told me of a dream he had where he saw an asparagus growing out of his thigh so he flicked it and rubbed it around and started pulling on it and it kept going and going. Never touched the stuff since.

That’s more than enough information, thank you.

Oh shit, Claude has enough credits to graduate with tens of thousands of degrees from hundreds of universities? All around a C-B average, weird.