I was standing in the lunch line of my K-12 school when a kid I was only vaguely acquainted with quipped, “I want to leave the world the way I entered it, naked and screaming.”
This was during the height of the Yo Mama joke era, so I quipped back, “No one wants to hear what you and your mom do behind closed doors,” and the whole line got quiet.
Turns out his mom died in a car crash earlier that month.
Another one was when I had just moved to a different location for my company as a help desk tech. I got a ticket for someone named David, according to AD. I went into the area where they worked and asked the room, “Is David here today?”
The whole room went quiet. Turns out the week before I moved offices HR had a meeting to announce that David is now Alice.
Alice didn’t give a fuck because I was obviously not dead naming her maliciously. After that we regularly hung out during smoke breaks.
Yup, I don’t think they ever had her name changed, but she was having trouble getting the state to approve the name change, which I’m assuming is why they hadn’t already done it.
I was standing in the lunch line of my K-12 school when a kid I was only vaguely acquainted with quipped, “I want to leave the world the way I entered it, naked and screaming.”
This was during the height of the Yo Mama joke era, so I quipped back, “No one wants to hear what you and your mom do behind closed doors,” and the whole line got quiet.
Turns out his mom died in a car crash earlier that month.
Another one was when I had just moved to a different location for my company as a help desk tech. I got a ticket for someone named David, according to AD. I went into the area where they worked and asked the room, “Is David here today?”
The whole room went quiet. Turns out the week before I moved offices HR had a meeting to announce that David is now Alice.
Alice didn’t give a fuck because I was obviously not dead naming her maliciously. After that we regularly hung out during smoke breaks.
Really thought your second story was gonna end with David being dead… Which I mean, it kinda does
Okay yeah his mom died but that was a pretty good clap back.
It was one of my rare moments of timely wittiness, so I was sad it didn’t land as well as it would have with a different kid.
That second one is on HR - should have changed their name in the system.
Yup, I don’t think they ever had her name changed, but she was having trouble getting the state to approve the name change, which I’m assuming is why they hadn’t already done it.