Long story short I don’t feel like I deserve romance in my life yet. I feel like I got nothing to offer. I have felt this way for most of my life. Even though I have developed plenty of hobbies (I dance, skateboard, climb, go to the gym, etc.) and social circles. On one hand I am happy with myself and on another I feel like I can’t offer the other party anything, romance wise.
Normally others would say ‘You’ll find someone dont’cha worry ‘bout notin’ ya’hear?’ But I am at a point now where I hope a woman will not develop feelings for me because I am afraid of disappointing her. And through the years this only been getting worse. I know this is not a good way of thinking but I just can’t shake it.
I want to (mentally) change but I just don’t know how. So if anyone has got some tips for me (really anything goes) that might help I would very much appreciate it.
Note: I don’t care if the process of learning self love is slow, I just want to know what the process involves.
Edit: I am reading some great suggestions. So thank you all for that. Just as a reminder, I am not expecting people on the internet to fix my problems. Just some general, rule of thumb, tips (and or tricks).
If you are physically and socially active, but still don’t feel self-value and have tried the standard things (e.g. taking a break, eating well etc) then maybe therapy is the best option?
This maybe a stupid question, but what sort of therapy?
Because I have been in therapy before. (CBT)
Not OP, but I know a few things about this. It might be less about the specific method, and more relevant to find a therapist that you connect with. But if CBT was not your jam, I would suggest a therapist who works with existentialist or a more psycho dynamic approach, like ISTDP.