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Joined 7 days ago
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Cake day: November 4th, 2026

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  • Of which, according to your own post, and the content you reference, he did none of those things.

    Regardless of gender, preference, what have you….

    No one is obligated to date you. Period. And if we take this a step further, they’re not even obligated to give you a reason, yet this man did. It wasn’t personal. He wasn’t being disrespectful. Yet- you’ve labeled him the same as someone that is hateful and refuse to budge.

    And based on your edit, where tou assumed everyone gender… you intended this to be an ‘Everyone grab your pitchforks’ style witch-hunt.

    Do better. There’s so little time we have here. Having said this, we can agree to just disageee.


  • That’s not bigotry.

    This is bigotry. Any man or woman trans or otherwise can support, befriend and love anyone of any gender of their choosing. They shouldn’t have to do this under duress of being called something they are not.

    And my examples remained as close to the topic as could be. Yours reached way out of bounds to illustrate your point.

    This isn’t about someone who had a single black great grandparent once way back in history. This is about a person currently, that kihrn have a trait that is u desirable to their preferences in choosing a romantic partner.

    Thus has absolutely nothing to do with bigotry unless we are redefining the word.











  • It’s not so easy to define though. Gender reassignment has gotten so good that it’s impossible to tell. Which is an amazing thing! However, there are people that have preferences based on criteria they set that determine and influence both who they find attractive, and what situations they are willing to accept in a mate. For instance, I personally don’t like country music. Am I a southphobe? A redneckist? No, but I don’t want to be in a relation with someone that listens to it. It’s not my thing. Yet I am not hateful towards those that enjoy it and in-fact, have many friends that love it.

    Now imagine I’m on a date, and it comes up during dinner that they love country music. It’s going to be a no for me. That doesn’t make me hateful.

    That some people don’t want their mate to have been assigned the same gender as them isn’t transphobia. It’s just a preference. He doesn’t want to deal with her having once been the same gender as him. That is HIS preference. And it is okay. If he is not hateful, or disrespectful, I’d say it’s not transphobia.

    But I’m not the authority on the subject. I’m just trying to add some nuance to the topic. Nothing more.



  • Regarding the edit: That’s totally fair. I understand.

    As far as the rest. Yeah. I see the point. However, I don’t think it was that he thought of her as less attractive, just outside of his wheelhouse. Take for example, my point about preferences, someone can be into people taller than them. It’s their thing. So if they need soomeome shorter, they may still find said person gorgeous, but the height is a deal-breaker.

    With this, it might just be that he doesn’t wan to be with someone that was once the same gender as him. We really can’t know why- but I’d have to agree with a few of the responses- I really don’t think I’d accuse h of being anti-trans. From the info given, he wasn’t offensive or rude, just surprised and kindly backed out.


  • I hope this doesn’t come off as argumentative, as that is not how it’s meant, but the way I see it, it wasn’t that he didn’t like her, or was transphobic, it’s just that he has preferences. This isn’t a crime. We all have preferences. Be they height, weight, cultural, tradition, what-have-you… this doesn’t make us anti-things outside of our prefered choices.

    For example: I like pumpkins. Love them as decorations, I think they’re pretty, I know they’re heathy as a food and good for nature, however… I don’t like to eat them at all. I don’t like the texture of pumpkin pie, I don’t like the flavor at all. It’s just not to my taste.

    Am I anti-pumpkin? Not even in the slightest.

    The point is, from what you said, he was kind to her, and wasn’t offended or being offensive TO her, he just wasn’t into her situation at all.

    Maybe this helps to understand it better?

    Again, absolutely no offense intended.