It could be ADHD. It could also be anxiety disorder. I was a history major in college, so I had a ton of papers to write. My anxiety made if extremely difficult to write anything. Like you, I’d write it out, delete, rewrite, delete etc. It was awful. At the time, I would actually start drinking to the point of being slightly inebriated. I found I could actually write better at that point, because the alcohol shut down that anxiety (and if I am honest, it made me give less of a fuck about what my professors would think of my writing). Obviously, not a great solution, but it was good short term and I always got good grades on my papers. Now that I am better medicated for my anxiety, I imagine it wouldn’t be so bad to write a paper now. Trouble is, my job really doesn’t require me to write much lol.

I was very slow as a kid due to juvenile arthritis. Thankfully, I outgrew it, but I can almost guarantee I am still it. This is such a whimsical and delightful thought. Thank you for the smile today stranger. I definitely needed it.

Don’t be fooled. They are illithids in disguise.

Jerry Cantrell has a song called “Psychotic Break” that has the line: “Chalking up my dead friends and loved ones long gone.” When I first heard that in 2002, I thought, “man, that must be an awful feeling.” I just heard it again yesterday and after I heard that line, now I get it.