Title says it all
The dumbest joke I know is a knock knock Joke and goes like this. You first have to make the person you’re telling the joke to start saying “knock knock”, then you you say, “who’s there?”.
Proceed to watch the other person confused about what to do next 😅
Usually, the most effective way is to say, “Wanna hear a knock knock joke?”
“Sure!”
“Okay, you start.”
Has about a 90% success rate.
I asked my North Korean friend how things are back at home.
He said he can’t complain.
An underage weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry, I can’t serve you alcohol, you’re too young”. The weasel replies that’s ok, I’ll drink something else. The bartender says “well I have water, soda pop, and cranberry juice, what’ll it be?”
“Pop!” goes the weasel
A duck walks into a bar wearing one shoe. The bartender says “hey buddy, you lost a shoe” and the duck says “nah, I found one!”
Him: Hey, when you’re out camping, do you enjoy it when you wake up in the morning and water vapor condensers on your lenses?
Me: DEW EYE?!?
Bob and Doug are building a fence.
Bob is throwing away half the nails.
Doug asks "Why are you throwing away the nails.
Bob replies “The heads are on the wrong end”
Doug shakes his head and says “Stupid, use those nails on the other side of the fence”
Two fish in a tank.
One turned to the other and asked; “How do we drive this thing?”
I got a new dog. He’s a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he’s not sure what I threw him.
“My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.”
-Mitch Hedberg
what’s red and smells like blue paint?
red paint.
I broke a mirror in my house, and you’re supposed to get seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five.
Why couldn’t the lifeguard save the drowning hippie?
He was too far out, man.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
If it had four doors it’s be a chicken sedan.
Why do chicken lay eggs?
The eggs would break if they threw them.
- What’s brown and sticky?
- A stick
What’s brown and rymes with Snoop?
Dr. Dre
I called the wrong number today. I said ‘Hello, is Joey there?’
A woman answered and she said ‘Yes he is.’
And I said ‘Can I speak to him please?’
She said ‘No, he can’t talk right now, he’s only two months old.’
I said 'Alright, I’ll wait
I’m sorry for spamming Steven Wright jokes. I’ll stop now