After many years I’m finally trying to move toward transitioning ,but there’s just so much to do that I don’t really know where or even how to start.
I fear that going directly into HRT without doing anything else before will just make things harder. That I should get laser or voice training first or I don’t know what else. I fear that doing it “wrong” will just make me feel awful and despite the mirror even more and push me back further into the “I don’t need it” thing.
I also have no idea of what is the current standard for HRT or what to expect and whenever I find myself thinking all of these I end up just not looking for doctors or more info.
Any help?
I wish I’d started HRT sooner. If you feel certain, start it; you’ll know fairly quickly if it’s not for you. And it takes sooooo long for any changes whatsoever.
I’ve been on it since November of 2025, and I’ve only experience some emotional changes, minimal breast development, and other, more mild physical changes (which could be placebo; not sure).
During this time (and kinda for a year—two years?—prior) I’ve worked on voice training, exploring presentation, and social transitioning (i.e. coming out to people).
I can, of course, stop the all of it at any time, since it’s all behavioral. Except HRT. The longer I live as a girl, the longer I become one. Every day, I become more certain of my decision, and every day, the changes caused by HRT increase.
Of course, this is just me: you do you.
Get a therapist though, if you can. They can make a world of difference. Also friends. They’re great too (even if they’re mostly online, like mine). Support is everything.
Have fun exploring! <3
cw: gender dysphoria, transphobia, self-hatred
Sometimes, I look into the mirror, and see a girl, and I love her. Those are the good days. On the bad ones, I see a freak, and I hate her. I misgender her, and call her “ugly”, and I mistreat her.
You’ll possibly feel the same way sometimes. But believe me: transitioning worth it. Be nice to the girl in the mirror. For me, okay? It’ll get better.
That’s is what I’m most afraid. I feel like seeing the “freak” in the mirror will be the straw that breaks me. I don’t know if I could take seeing the “maybe” turn into a very soundly “no”. I’ve always felt that trying something like clothes before anything else will just make me feel worse, I don’t know how to explain it, hehe. That’s what I fear the most.
If you’re brave, you’ll get to the other side, and you’ll be content. It’s hard, but not impossible. Self-love and physical / presentational transition are your new besties.